Mmmmmmm...

Damn, but I really shouldn't have read Instapundit today...

ONE OF MY COLLEAGUES fell while hiking in the mountains and had to have four vertebrae in her neck fused (she's lucky she can walk). While she's recovering, we're taking turns cooking dinner for her. Tonight's my turn and I'm taking Insta-Chicken, which travels well.

And he even provided a link to the recipe for Insta-Chicken which sounds almost good enough to eat.

Ingredients: 3 large baking potatoes; 3 sweet potatoes; two large onions; one fryer hen; assorted spices

Preheat an oven to 350. Start with a nice fryer hen, about 3 lbs. Clean and then mist with olive oil. (If the InstaWife isn't around to object that it contains fat, also rub with one tablespoon butter, which doesn't add many calories, but does add a lot of flavor). Sprinkle with salt, pepper, paprika (lots), garlic, and a bit of sage. Place in a large, covered roasting pan.

Now chop the onions into quarters, and add to the roasting pan. Slice the potatoes (both kinds) into inch-thick sections and add to the pan as well. (Some peeled baby carrots are nice, too, but the InstaWife is allergic to carrots, so we skip those). Next, in a measuring cup add two ounces each of worcestershire, teriyaki, soy, and whatever wine you have around (I used the last of a bottle of Reynolds Merlot tonight). Pour over the chicken and vegetables, then cover the pan.

Put in the oven for about two hours and go do whatever you want -- you're done cooking. Two hours later, serve the chicken, which will be wonderfully tender and succulent, on a platter. Remove the vegetables and serve separately in a large serving bowl. Total prep time is about 15 minutes, there's not much to clean up, and as a nice side effect, the house smells wonderful when your family gets home.

Oh yeah. Now I'm hungry, all right. I think I'm going to go and see if I can make this when I get home from movie-watching tomorrow. (Methinks I'll bite the bullet and pay matinee prices for MI:3. I've seen the other two and, quite frankly, it can't be worse than MI:2 was.) Of course, I'm fresh out of worcestershire, so part of me is wondering if a few shakes of tabasco will do just as well, particularly if I go easier on the paprika.

(And my next plan? Come up with a way to become a) a colleague of one Glenn Reynolds and b) suffer some debilitating injury. 'Cause that would just rock.)

Of course, seeing as how I am inherently a decent guy, I'd probably have to invite a certain embattled local blogger over for dinner if this recipe works out well for higher altitudes. (Don't worry, though. I won't ask him to put out or anything. But his armadillo, on the other hand...) On the other hand, looks like someone else is having a bad day as well. (See, this is the trouble with being a nice-but-highly-indecisive guy. All these people around me seem to be having a tough bit, and all I can do is look like a dumb-ass while trying to figure out who to extend a hand towards first.)

[UPDATE: 21 May 06 01:00a]
Trust me. Leave off the tabasco. Oick. Almost tasted like it was pickled rather than baked. Guess I'll put that one down for Great Cooking Mistakes Of History. Will try again at the end of the month.

And trust me again, M:i 3 is not worth regular ticket prices. Matinee pricing is okay, though.